When I was little, and even to this day, I never liked to journal or write about myself. Despite that, I still wanted to find a way to express how I was feeling or to help me deal with situations I found myself in at different points in my life. Everyone needs something that they can connect with, and around seventh grade, I found that connection with music.  After finding songs that I associated with, I branched out from the flimsy pop music that I had been listening to and started listening to punk, rock and some indie music that made everything just ‘click’.

Throughout the years, I have collected a group of songs that stay with me as I grow older. The list goes on to create a large amount of music but to keep things short and sweet I am shrinking the list down to my top four songs. Each song is associated with different feelings, and I hang onto them to help me overcome any challenges that are thrown at me.

Hey Jude by The Beatles

This is a song that I hold close to my heart not because of the lyrics, even though they are wonderful, but rather because it is a song that my friend Emmett sang to me. This song is one of the newest to my collection, but it quickly made its way to the top of my list of comfort songs. It was nearing the end of the summer when I was having a rather large internal conflict. I am a bit of a control freak, so when the internal confliction occurred I was panicking over the fact that I had to let go over some of the control I had over things in my life. One day, I called Emmett on Skype and after a bout of ranting/venting, I broke down crying and shortly after that he started singing to me in an attempt to get me to calm down. It took almost the entire 7 minute song to calm me down. However, after I did calm down, my problems seemed to sort themselves out in my head and I was able to relax. To this day, I will still listen to “Hey Jude” whenever any sort of negative emotions start stirring.

I’m Just a Kid by Simple Plan

Simple Plan, a unique sounding Canadian pop-punk band, was formed in 1999 and had the goal of making music that really connected with their audience. The song “I’m Just a Kid” achieved this goal by having a meaning that says, in the end one just need to remember that one is a kid and mistakes are bound to happen every once and a while but one just cannot let it get them down. In life, I put extra and unnecessary pressure on myself, and this is a song that I listen too when I feel too overwhelmed with the things going on around me. This song normally supplies a much needed two minute escape from reality for me that I use to collect myself and pick myself up off the floor.

The Reckless and The Brave by All Time Low

Everyone has their own individual voice that for the most part goes unsung when you are talking about the social oddities of the world. This song points out that the majority of people are always trying to fit into social norms and standards, while there are others that lie outside of that that are looked down upon, and told that they will not make it in the world. It then goes on to say, “Long live the reckless and the brave,” or in other words, social oddities will make it if they hold their ground against everything being thrown at them. I myself am considered one of these “social oddities”,  so upon hearing this song, my face was spilt with a grin, knowing that there were people rooting for those like me to get their voices heard.

The Middle by Jimmy Eat World

At this point in my life it is just second nature to try and put myself down and be cruel to myself whether it’s from years of bullying to just nitpicky comments while standing in a mirror. This song confronts those thoughts specifically by stating that the rude comments are only in one’s head and really one is not as bad as they think they are. As the song, “The Middle,” goes into the chorus and says that everything takes time, and as long as one are puts the proper amount of effort into life things will end just fine. I myself am very guilty self-deprecation, so the first time I heard this song, I was skeptical to believing that my thoughts were actually just something that my mind was creating. With time though, and a whole lot of effort, I have been able to stop thinking so negatively, and this song is what helped me make that initial realization.

Overall I have kept my music with my as my own version of a diary, letting each song represent me in different ways. As I get older I am willing to bet that the list will just keep growing as I experience new things in life and new emotions.